In Which I Apologize

Monday, May 13, 2013

Post #2 of the day! The theme for today's post is, " Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be." I tend to apologize... a lot. For things over which I have no control, and mostly for things that weren't actually my fault in the first place. But here are some things I would like to issue public apologies for in general.

To the universe:

I apologize for being a complete and total spaz.

I apologize for acting like the world is ending when it is clearly doing no such thing.

I'm sorry for wearing really terrible glasses and having horrifically bad bangs until 8th grade.

I'm sorry for inadvertently swearing in front of small children.

I'm sorry for throwing up on the subway that one time (whoops).

I'm sorry for never knowing what I wanted to do with my hair for formals, but not liking anything the stylist was trying.

I apologize for having no tolerance whatsoever for bad drivers or stupid people.

To Ken: 

I apologize for watching terrible TV shows like "America's Next Top Model," "My Big, Fat, American, Gypsy, Wedding," and ridiculous shows on E! like "Blinging up Baby" (which, if you're wondering, was about celebrity babies and how much money their parents spend on things like nurseries... it was nauseating, I don't recommend watching it... ever.)

I apologize for being a complete control freak, especially when I ask you to do something and then end up taking over it and doing it myself.

I'm sorry that you have to share a bathroom with me and my 937 beauty products.

I'm sorry that my laundry is complicated. (Turn that inside out! Hang that to dry! Don't put bras in the dryer!)

I'm sorry that I'm sick all the time a lot of the time, in some way or another.

I'm sorry that sometimes, I just have ridiculous meltdowns that end up with me crying in bed for three days.

I'm sorry that I steal the sheets and have a complicated "nesting" process when I'm getting comfortable in bed.

I'm sorry that I lived in NJ and that you ended up having to move here, especially because the roads don't make sense and you can't make left turns. (Although those last two are not my fault.)

To Myself:

I'm sorry for being so hard on, well... me.

I'm sorry for not appreciating the things I've done or accomplished.

I'm sorry for not liking myself.

I'm sorry for doubting myself.

I'm sorry for being meaner to myself than I would ever allow anyone to be to any of my friends.

I'm sorry for dwelling in the past and worrying about the future.

To my friends, my husband, and the world at large... thanks for putting up with crazy, controlling, meltdown-and-injury-prone, me. I do appreciate it, and every day, I get better at being less of a spaz. Thanks for being there. :)

Another fun post awaits us tomorrow... for now, check out the link-up to everyone else's public apologies!

- A


  1. I like blog comments on my blog, so I thought you might too. Also I think we might be twins. Just saying.

    I love this post.

  2. Aw, thanks, Ruth! I'll make sure to stop by your blog! :)


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