In Which We Get Embarrassed

Friday, May 10, 2013

Oh thank God, we've made it to Friday. There were a few moments where I thought we might not make it, but here we are. It has been a week of ups and downs, a week of rain, and a week of still not feeling great... but the week is basically over, so I think we win! The weather is much nicer today, although the fact that it's supposed to be 84 and it's May 10th is kind of unsettling. I know it's obnoxious, but I am only happy in a small temperature range. In fact, it's so specific that Ken jokes that he must "store the wife at optimal temperature" like I'm some kind of rare, frail, endangered, plant that may die at any moment. I mean, last summer, I did spend close to 2 weeks just randomly passing out in July because I was too hot. As a biologist, I often wonder how I would have fared as a cave-person. My suspicion is "not well at all". Evolution would have done away with me immediately, between my horrible allergies and my propensity for injuring myself

Anyway, enough about how I'm a spaz with poor homeostatic controls. On to today's topic from Blog Every Day at May, which is "Most Embarrassing Moment(s). Spill." As someone who is a complete spaz, I have had plenty of embarrassing moments. Here are some of my favorite ones... if that makes sense, haha.

1. The time I passed out on stage during a choir concert in college - This is why we don't lock our knees when we stand, kids. This is also why we don't forget to eat and do things on 3 hours of sleep. I totally missed the best movement of Haydn's "Lord Nelson Mass" because I was in the back closet backstage,
lying on the floor with my shirt off, trying to not lose consciousness.

2. The time I threw up backstage during an orchestra concert - I was playing my first concert with the Philharmonic of Southern NJ when I was 16, and I was so excited because we were performing Scheherazade, which is gorgeous and fun. In the middle of the piece, I suddenly felt extremely ill and had to leave the stage... and then I threw up backstage in a dressing room, while laying on a weird couch. My stand partner found me during the intermission and got my mom. It was super awkward. AND I missed playing the damn piece!

3. Falling
- I can't just pick one instance of this. I transferred to Drexel University as a sophomore, and as I was rushing to my first class because I was worried that I wouldn't be able to find it, I tripped up the stone steps going into the building. Everything flew out of my bag and my water bottle rolled away down the steps and into the street. Not only was I now lying on the ground with all of my crap everywhere, I was bleeding. Awesome. A similar thing happened when I was walking down the sidewalk on my way to class another time. For no apparent reason, I just lost my shit and fell over. Threw my phone ten feet in front of me, ripped my jeans, bled all over my books... for no reason. Nothing tripped me, I wasn't doing 16 things at once... I am just a spaz. And of course, whenever I fall, there's 937 people around to witness it. I can't just make a fool of myself quietly. Then there was the time I was sitting in bed and my foot got tangled in the sheets as I was trying to get up... and I collapsed onto the floor in a pile. The cats were confused, and to be honest, so was I, because I had no idea what had just happened. Good times. And we all know about how I fell out of a bathtub and fractured my spine. As one of my best friends once asked, "Are you from a planet with less gravity? Because you seem to have a problem with it." She might be on to something.

I think that about covers my embarrassing moments, although that certainly isn't all of them. Fortunately, I haven't died from embarrassment (yet) and most of the time, I haven't injured myself in any kind of life-altering way (except for that falling out of the tub thing). Thanks for still loving me even though I'm a total spaz. Check out everyone else's embarrassing moments here at the link-up, and stay tuned for tomorrow's post!

Also, I swear that there will be non-Blog-Every-Day-In-May-Posts soon.... ish.  :)

- A

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