And Then We Got Accosted by Wild Turkeys (And Other Adventures)

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Well folks, it's Wednesday and I've already had at least three meltdowns, including one before 6:30 am, which has  to be some kind of record, right? I'll expect my certificate to arrive in the mail any day now, thanks. It's also Wonderful Stuff Wednesday, so there will be some fun links down at the bottom to check out. But first, a story. Or three.

As I mentioned before, Ken and I have been house hunting. This has been... an experience. Adjectives that I might use to describe this experience include, but are not limited to confusing, interesting, exciting, terrifying, annoying, bizarre, unsettling, thrilling, gross, enlightening, educational, and fun. Sometimes, it's all of those things at once. It's also caused me to say a lot of things, such as:

"Why would this person paint all of the rooms in their house various neon colors? Oh God, it looks like a clown tripping on acid designed this place."

"Why on earth is this carpet mauve... and more importantly, why is that wall made of marble?"

"Well, I guess you could paint your walls and your ceiling hunter green... that's a choice."

"Oh hey, this wall paper is literally taped to the walls."

"Why is there a random spiral staircase here when there's a perfectly functional, normal staircase in the front of the house?"

"I think someone stapled this carpet down through the top..."

"Why are all of these doors lockable from the outside? Eek."

"Oh hey there's a fireplace... in the bedroom?"

"Why the hell is this entire kitchen covered in contact paper?"

"Do you think someone died in here?"

"I think I need a round of vaccines after being in that bathroom."

"I guess it's cool that there's a third floor... but what the hell would we do with this space... and why are there three ceiling fans up here?"

"Is there a reason this lamp looks like a disco ball?"

"I guess these people really liked this grey carpet... that they put in every room of their house."

"Can I fit in that closet under the stairs?"

"I think that dishwasher is older than I am."

"Holy shit, wild turkeys."

Yes, there was a herd of wild turkeys at one of the condos we saw yesterday. A small herd.


These guys (girls?) were literally trying to attack our realtor's car as we turned into the parking lot of the condo complex, and then I had to shoo them away from my driver's side door when I attempted to exit my own car. They were less than thrilled. Apparently, there are 2 more that belong to this group, and there's another herd of 5 more turkeys that wander the area. One of the neighbors told us that the groups showed up about 6 months ago and they have no idea why or from whence they came. Also, turkeys are aggressive, man.

As you can see, it's been quite the adventure. So far, we've seen 9 houses, 8 of which were no good. We saw one last night that we weren't 100% "IN LOVE" with, but we might put an offer in anyway just to see how it goes. It's a 4 bedroom, 2.5 bathroom townhome in Marlton, which is where I grew up. It's much more spacious than what we have now and has some nice upgrades. It would need paint, and I'd like to replace the carpets (either with new carpet or laminate/fake hardwood), but it has a new roof and the windows are newer. There is a tiny backyard where we could grow some herbs or veggies, lots of closets/storage, and a fireplace (although that's in the dining room, oddly). It has a galley kitchen, which are not my favorite, but it's not nearly as narrow as the one we used to have, there's decent counter space, and the appliances are newer. There's nothing really wrong with it... but I didn't have that "WOW" moment that I guess I was expecting. Can I see us living there? Sure. I guess. But again, there wasn't some magical moment.

Although, I didn't really have that moment when I bought my wedding dress, either. I liked it, it was fine, I could see myself getting married in it, and it was in my budget. There wasn't anything really wrong with it, minus the fact that I hated how much I weighed, but then I lost 40 pounds and things were better. So maybe I'm just not someone who has "moments". For those of you who have bought houses... what do you think? How did you know you found "the one"?

So yes, we were accosted by wild turkeys. Sometimes, life is random like that. In fact, life is really random and confusing at times, and plans can change in an instant. For example, between Monday when I posted and this morning, I had a huge meltdown about how I didn't really want to go to Florida while we were trying to house hunt and while work was kind of nuts, and this morning, I canceled my trip. Of course, it wasn't that simple and the cancellation of today's trip was preceded by yelling and freaking out while packing, a nearly sleepless night, waking up before my alarm and being unable to go back to sleep, arguing with myself while getting ready for work, multiple phone calls to my mom, crying while driving to work, a frantic email to a Twitter friend who offered her kind ear, the making of a T-chart, a half-started blog post, and finally calling my dad before he went to work to tell him that I was losing my mind going to have to reschedule my trip because I was somehow too stressed out to go to on vacation. (Figure that one out, will you?)

I guess it sounds kind of nuts to be that upset and stressed out about changing plans, but the real issue was that I didn't want to tell my dad that I wasn't coming and have him be really disappointed. After I was accepted to Rowan, I had toyed with the idea of canceling my trip and even had talked to my dad about it, but I decided that I needed to go anyway. The closer we got to the trip though, the less I wanted to go and the less reason I saw for going. I also knew that my anxiety about telling my dad my change of plans was completely and totally irrational, but there is some context there that you're kind of missing. The Reader's Digest Condensed Version is that my parents divorced when I was 3 and my dad moved to Florida, where he's lived ever since. Growing up, I barely had a relationship with my dad, not because he was a bad person, but simply because it's really hard to have a relationship with someone you barely knew when they left and who now exists 1300 miles away from your life. In high school, the relationship that I had longed for finally began to materialize and ever since then, we've been very close. We talk multiple times a week and try to see each other as often as we can. I know that the relationship is solid and stable, and that my dad supports me in my decisions. I also know that if I happen to do something that he doesn't like, he isn't going to stop speaking to me or disown me. At least... I know that intellectually.

Somewhere in my brain is the 7 year old girl who misses her dad and wants so badly for him to be a part of her life that she would literally do anything to make him happy. That little part of me lives and dies on his approval. (A similar part of me lives and dies on my mother's approval, but I spent a long time in therapy getting over my need for that. Or... at least I'm still in therapy working on that.) There was some part of me that was terrified to tell him that I wasn't coming because I knew how disappointed he'd be, and disappointing someone is one of my most hated things in life. I was worried that he'd tried to talk me out of it, or that he'd want to know why... when really, the reason was, "Because I can't imagine leaving right now because my life feels insane," which also sounds insane because who the hell is too stressed to go to Florida on vacation?? Oh right, I am. That would be me.

As it turns out, my dad didn't disown me, violently press "end call" on his cell phone, or decide to never speak to me ever again. He wasn't even angry (which apparently is surprising to no one but me). He was disappointed, but only because he really likes spending time with me. He said that no matter what, he will always support my decisions, and that he understands that I have to do what is best for me. He said that he knows that I have a life and that he has to fit into my life, not the other way around. It really was the best that conversation could have gone, and yet I still have some lingering sadness about not going because I do like visiting with my dad. I just am not in a place to go away for 6 days while house hunting, trying to keep work from collapsing into a pile, and while not feeling 100% physically well. I'm also pretty sure that by Sunday, I would have been ready to shoot myself out of boredom because we didn't really have any plans for while I was down there and I can only do nothing for so long. At least now, I can schedule the trip for when it makes more sense with my life and when I can actually go and enjoy the time I'm spending there. What a novel idea.

That's all the news from here today, so without further ado, Wonderful Stuff Wednesday!

First up, some graphics of the various ways in which Hollywood has destroyed our country in film. Who knew "The Blob" took place in Downingtown, PA? I sure didn't.

I also love when Jenny, writer of The Bloggess, recaps what search terms brought people to her blog. Some of my favorites this time around were:

“Why is everything making sense in my life?”  (Frankly, that would be disconcerting to me too.)

Mouse riding on octopus (The weird thing here is that seven different people looked for this.  I’ve disappointed seven people in one week.  At least.)

“You mean I’m not a reptile.”  (You sound disappointed.  But if you typed this you are probably not a reptile.  Or you’re a very talented reptile.  Either way?  Good news.)

“Is it safe to fix a loose needle on meth syringe with superglue?” (None of that is safe.  Everything you said is unsafe.  I’m not sure why I’m having to clarify that.)

This post on A Practical Wedding today, which has nothing to do with weddings, had me nodding along every line. What is it about our generation that makes us feel the need to do more, see more, have more, often to the point of self-detriment? I see it in myself all the time. How about you?

I might need this in my life. On a billboard.

Also, this is one of my new favorite songs and subsequently, new favorite bands. You might have heard this on the radio, but what intrigued me about it is the accordian! I swear, it's more fun than it sounds.

Anyway, those are some of the wonderful things I've found around and experienced. What's wonderful for you today? Share it in the comments... after the morning I had, I could sure use it!

- A


  1. Did you get that song from Kristian? She played it for me on Saturday, and I just love that guy's low raspy voice. Plus, yes, the accordion does rock pretty hard.

    *hugs* I hope you can de-stress in other ways, even if you're not going to Florida right now.

    1. Actually, I didn't get the song from Kristian, I heard it on the radio. You should listen to the rest of the album. I forget, does Spotify work in Canada?

      This weekend turned out to be pretty relaxing, so that was good. Basically, I was just glad I wasn't in Florida, haha.

  2. Hubby and I have been looking online for a place to rent ... not done the serious looking yet, but hope we won't encounter angry wild turkeys when we do!

    I hope things get a bit more stress-free for you!

    1. I hope you avoid all encounters with angry birds, turkeys or otherwise! I think looking for housing is one of the most stressful things of all time. I hope you and the husband find something lovely!

  3. I like this post! And I love your blog! Followed you here and on Bloglovin as well. I hope you'd check my blog too and follow-back. :)



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